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Prologue
It happened on a chilly autumn day. A day that Alice didn’t want to think
about. A day that she knew she’d one day have to dig deep into the recesses of
her memory to relive for the sake of those around her.
Staring out of her kitchen window, she pulled her cardigan tight around
her midsection, watching the autumn foliage that fell to the earth below,
cascading across the yard like a painting that her husband would have loved to
look at.
It wasn’t that she wanted to forget – part of her journey was to make
sure that the story was told. It was important, but at the same time, a
bittersweet situation. After all, it was the best and worst day of her life. Closing
her eyes, Alice blinked back the tears, forcing a smile as she turned back
toward the kitchen table. Sitting down, she intertwined her fingers in the
handle of her coffee cup, sipping on her drink that was now too cold to
stomach.
The patter of footsteps pulled her from her daydream. Looking up, she
forced a smile.
“Alice, dear, what are you doing in here all alone? We’re all in the
living room. How about you join us?”
Standing up, Alice poured the coffee down the drain. She loved her
family, but this time of year, it felt as if they smothered her. What would she
do without the support? She just hated all of the attention. She hated being
viewed as a delicate flower on the brink of breaking down. She had to be
strong, especially today.
“I’ll be right in there, Mom. Let me tidy up a few things and then we can
get started.”
A lump formed in her throat. She heard laughter. She heard her family
gathering around the fire. She heard happiness. Again she wondered – what would
she do without their support?
Turning toward a shelf, Alice took a long, hard look at a picture that
always caught her attention. Tracing her index finger over it, she felt a
solitary tear trickle down her cheek, and she quickly wiped it away. Her memory
flashed to everything, bringing up things she hadn’t thought about in a long
time. Before she could face her family, she needed some time alone. She had to
get it all organized in her head.
Walking up the stairs to her room, she sat on the edge of the bed and
began to recollect everything. No holding back. Even if it was painful, she had
to rehash every detail. It’s the way he’d want it. Her family would have to
wait. This was her moment to do the man she loved justice.
“This is for you, Babe. Help me tell your story.”
Chapter One
“You like him, don’t you?”
Alice eyed the tall, dark, and handsome stranger from across the room.
She didn’t want to be at the bar, but against her will, her friends had brought
her out. She noticed the beer in his hand and the way he interacted with
several guys, standing around a pool table. Her eyes caught his, and though she
had never spoke one word to the man, her heart skipped a beat. He paused,
holding the bottle to his lips before taking a long pull off of it. Her cheeks
heated up, and she looked away.
“How could I not? He’s gorgeous.”
“Go talk to him!” Her friend gave her a shove, but she resisted, her
confidence quickly wavering.
“Are you kidding me? He wouldn’t give me the time of day. No! You go talk
to him, Mandy!”
“I think he’s interested in you.”
Alice ignored her friend and ordered another Chilton from the bartender,
drinking it too fast. She needed it. How would she be able to walk up to a guy
like that? To even consider having a chance with him was laughable. Before
going back to her group, she took another glance in his direction, feeling a
twinge of disappointment when he was no longer there. Had he already left? Why
did it matter? She didn’t know him from Adam. He wasn’t the first handsome man
she had seen and wouldn’t be her last.
Pushing through the crowd, she tried to fight her way back to Mandy and
everyone else when she ran right into someone, spilling most of her drink down
her arm.
“Damn it, I’m so sorry!” Looking up, she felt her breath literally get
pulled out of her lungs. There he was, right in front of her, his wide smile
causing her heart to thump so hard that she was certain he could see it through
her shirt.
“Don’t worry about it. I’ve had worse spilled on me.”
Finally getting a good look at him, Alice noticed that his eyes were
green. Holy crap. So green that they stood
out, even in the dark bar. Maybe his tan complexion was helping accentuate
them, or maybe it was his dark hair that curled up around the brim of his
baseball cap. It should be illegal how attractive he was, and she hoped she
wasn’t being too obvious with her infatuation with him.
He stuck his hand out and said, “I’m Jack. What’s your name?”
“Alice. Or idiot. Whatever you wanna call me for not watching where I was
going.”
Smirking, he latched onto her hand. His palms were sandpaper rough. A
workingman. Damn, did he have any flaws?
“Forget about it. It’s nice to meet you. What are you drinking? I’ll get
you another one at the bar,” Jack replied as he helped guide her back through
the crowd.
“You really don’t have to do that. I probably shouldn’t have any more to
drink anyway. I’m already a tad bit tipsy.”
Arching his thick eyebrow, he squinted as a small smile crept on his
lips. The subtle look melted Alice’s heart. “Hard to tell with how gracefully
you pushed through everyone. Or is it falling with style?”
Slapping his arm, she laughed at his sarcastic remark. What was she
feeling? She had just met this man. She couldn’t be hanging on his every word
so fast. Maybe it was the alcohol. Maybe he wasn’t really as good looking as
she was thinking. She’d made the mistake before – once the beer goggles come
off, it was shameful to admit how blind she could be with people.
Jack ordered another beer and her Chilton. “You play pool?”
“If by play you mean knock the cue ball around with no real goal, then
yes, I play pool.”
Reaching for her hand again, Jack led her back to a pool table. They were
alone, and she wondered where his group of friends had gone, but thankful that
she had this time alone with him. As he gathered up the balls, she took a
second to step back and admire him. His dark polo shirt looked great, and those
jeans – it was like they were tailored just for him, fitting him great in all
the areas she couldn’t help but notice. As he reached across the table, she
watched as the muscles in his forearms and lower biceps rippled beneath the
fabric. Drinking did this to her. She always turned into a horny teenager.
Looking up, Jack adjusted his baseball cap as he gathered two pool sticks
and chalked the ends of them. Oh no! Did he catch her staring? Again, her
cheeks heated up but he gave no indication that he was on to her.
Handing her one, he smiled again. “Do the honors of breaking them?”
“On one condition, Jack. You can’t laugh at me.”
“I promise not to laugh.”
Alice positioned the pool stick, feeling like a complete fool as she
lined up her shot. Without even really aiming, she reared back and hit the cue
ball as hard as she could, sending the triangle of balls across the table. Jack
counted as three dropped into the corner pockets, his eyes wide as he looked at
her.
“You’re hustling me, aren’t you?”
“I’m not hustling you. Just lucky, I guess.”
She saw Mandy approaching them, and waved at her to get her attention.
“Mandy, this is Jack! Jack, this is my best friend, Mandy.”
Jack shook her hand and nodded. “Pleased to meet you.”
“Likewise,” Mandy replied. “Alice, we probably should get home. We’ve got
finals in the morning.”
“Since when are you the mother hen?” Alice laughed. “I wanna stay and
finish this game with Jack.”
Mandy sized Jack up again, not looking amused. “How are you gonna get
home? I don’t want to leave you here and I’m ready to go.”
“Listen, Mandy, my name is Jack Turner. I work at the fire station just
down the street. If anything happens to Alice, you can come looking for me
there. I’ll get her home safe. You’re a great friend to come check on her.”
Mandy bit her bottom lip as she contemplated what Jack had just told her.
“You think you can flash around the fact that you’re a firefighter and think
it’s all okay? How do I know that you’re really telling the truth?”
Alice stepped in between them. The last thing she needed was Mandy
ruining the great chemistry she was having with him. “Mandy, it’s fine. If all
else fails, I’ll call a cab. I’m good. Go home and get some rest. I’ll call you
if I need anything.” For a second, Alice did question Jack’s honesty. They had
only known each other for thirty minutes. What if he was lying? How did she
know his name was really Jack Turner? She had never done anything like this. It
was usually Mandy wanting to stay. In a way, it was a refreshing change,
especially when she saw the look on Jack’s face. She couldn’t let him go so
soon. She wanted to know more about the man.
Smoothing her hands down the pool stick, she grinned. “Now, where were
we?”
***
“Sorry to get you home so late. I lost track of time with everything.”
Jack walked her up the driveway to her front door. “What time are your tests
tomorrow?”
Alice looked down at her watch. It was a little after two AM. Had the
bars not closed then, she was certain they’d still be there hanging out. “My
first one isn’t until ten. I’ll be fine.”
“You don’t need to study or anything?” He looked down at her, his
expression concerned. “I’d hate to be the reason you fail a test.”
Shaking her head, Alice leaned in, taking in his scent. There was a
subtle smell of beer, but his musky cologne was stronger, clouding her senses.
It was too early to decide that he was perfect. With her luck, she’d never see
him again.
“If I don’t know the material by now, I’m doomed. I can’t cram it all in
tonight. I won’t fail it. I love the class. I’ve retained a lot over the
semester.”
Nodding, Jack held her hand in his. His thumb rubbed down her palm, and
he lifted it to his lips, kissing the back of it. His five o’clock shadow
rubbed against her skin, sending a chill down her spine.
“Can I see you again?” It came out in a whisper, but Alice heard it loud
and clear.
“I’d love that,” Alice replied. Was she dreaming? Was he asking her out
again?
“When are finals over?”
“My last test is tomorrow afternoon.”
“That’s perfect. I’ll come pick you up about six. Sound good?”
Alice giggled and the sound that escaped her was surprising. She had
never sounded like a lovesick kid, but suddenly she felt like it again. “And
what do you have in mind, Jack?”
Taking the steps back down to the sidewalk, he glanced at her from over
his shoulder, twirling his keys in his right hand. “I guess you’ll have to wait
and see, Alice. I’ll see you at six. Good luck on your tests.”
“Thanks, Jack.”
Unlocking her front door, she fell back on her couch and closed her eyes.
What was happening? Was she lost in how handsome he was? Lust was a good way to
affect her judgment, but this was different. Lots of smooth talking men had
come in and out of her life, and none of them had ever made her feel that way.
Normally she’d be a basket case on the eve of her finals, but it was the last
thing on her mind.
Walking down the hallway, she caught herself smiling in the mirror. Jack
Turner. Six o’clock seemed like an eternity away.
***
Alice looked at the clock on the nightstand. From the sounds coming from
downstairs, her family was fine. They could wait longer. She was just getting
started. Good memories helped, and she lay back on her mounds of pillows, ready
to relive every moment. There was no use in stopping it. The time was
appropriate, and she closed her eyes, delving right back into her past like it
was happening again.
Chapter Two
It was five thirty and Alice was freaking out. What in the heck was she
supposed to wear? Jack hadn’t told her what the plans were, and in the midst of
being so caught off guard, she didn’t even bother to get his phone number to
call and ask. Sifting through her closet, she pushed aside several hangers, not
liking anything. Several outfits were laid out on her bed, none sticking out to
her.
“Alice?”
Was that Mandy? What was she doing here? Alice poked her head out of her
bedroom door. “In here!”
“You didn’t call me like you said. I wanted to make sure that guy didn’t
kill you last night.”
“That’s nice of you,” Alice said as she threw another dress onto her pile
of no’s.
“What’s going on in here? Getting rid of some stuff?” Mandy eyed the
mess.
“No. I can’t find anything to wear.”
“What do you mean? You’ve got more clothes than anyone I know.”
Alice shook her head. “Nothing looks right.”
“How do you think you did on your finals?” Mandy asked as she found a
spot to sit on the bed. “Staying out last night was a bad idea. I paid for it
this morning.”
“Fine, I guess.” Alice hadn’t given them a second thought. She was too
busy thinking about Jack and what his plans were.
“Are you kidding me? You normally obsess over them. Who are you and what
have you done with my best friend?” Mandy folded her arms over her chest as she
contemplated the situation. Wagging her finger, she stood up again and paced
around the room. “Something is going on here. What is happening?”
Alice had never smiled so much in her life. Grabbing her friend’s arm,
they sat back down on the bed. “You remember Jack from last night, right?” She
didn’t wait for her friend to answer. “He asked me out again tonight.”
“That sexy guy at the pool table? You’re kidding me!”
“Nope. And he’ll be here in like fifteen minutes, so I really need to
finish getting ready.”
“This early? Oh dang. He’s gonna take you to dinner. That’s classy.”
Mandy walked to the closet and pulled out a yellow sundress. “Wear this. It’s
casual and fancy all in one. It shows off your hot shoulders too. It says, hey,
I’m not a whore, but I’m also not a prude.”
Alice grabbed the dress and held it up against herself. “You think? It’s
cut kind of low.”
“He’ll love it.”
Alice wanted to ask how Mandy was so sure. Neither knew what Jack liked.
She didn’t have time to argue. “Yellow sundress it is.” She checked herself one
last time in the mirror, coming to the conclusion that no matter what she did,
she was nervous, and she would second-guess any decision she made.
“You look beautiful, Alice. You must really like this guy. I’ve never seen
you get so dolled up for a man.”
“I’m not sure what it is.” They walked into the living room and she tried
to be patient. “I had alcohol to loosen me up last night.”
“I’m sure there’s some vodka in the freezer,” Mandy replied.
“I can’t get liquored up every time I go out with him,” Alice said,
laughing at the thought.
A car door slammed and she tried hard not to look out the window.
Footsteps thudded and finally, he was on her porch, knocking. Smoothing her
hands down her dress, she looked at Mandy, forcing a nervous smile. “Wish me
luck.”
“You got it, Alice. Have fun.”
Opening the door, Alice tried hard to compose herself. It wasn’t beer
goggles making Jack Turner handsome. He just was, plain and simple. Even in
jeans and a button up shirt, he made her feel things that she never had
experienced. His shirt was sky blue and just like the night before, perfect for
him. He didn’t have the baseball cap on, and his brown hair was thick and
spiked, almost as if it had a mind of it’s own.
“Good evening, Alice. You look beautiful.”
Would she ever get to a point where she didn’t blush every time he spoke
to her? “You clean up nicely yourself, Jack.”
Walking to his truck, he opened her door and helped her step up into the
cab. His hand on the small of her back felt like electricity, and she missed
the contact when he closed the door and went to the driver’s side. Looking
toward her house, Alice saw Mandy peeking through the front window, watching
closely. Giving a small wave, Alice turned back to Jack as he put the truck in
gear and merged out onto the street.
“I see you got through your finals. How’d you do?”
She could smell his aftershave and it was intoxicating. She took tests
today? It had escaped her again. Her mother had told her about this. She could
hear her now, warning her to stay away from guys until she graduated – they’d
do nothing but pull her from your studies. It was happening, finally.
“I think I did good. Grades should be posted by the end of the week.
What’d you do today?”
He glanced at her from the corner of his eye and focused back on the
road. “Thought about tonight. Thought about you. Pissed at myself that I didn’t
get your phone number.”
Thought about me? This was
definitely a dream she didn’t want to wake up from. “What exactly are we gonna
do tonight?”
“What would you like to do, Alice?”
He pulled up to a red light and shifted in his seat. Unbuckling her
seatbelt, Alice scooted across the leather, settling in the middle seat. Where
was the boldness coming from? Where was the shy girl she knew? Leaning in, she
rested her head against his arm, taking his manly scent in. To her surprise,
his hand fell to her thigh, and again, the electric feel of his embrace shocked
her.
“Let’s get dinner and take it from there,” she finally replied. “I’m not
picky. I’d be content with fast food.”
Shaking his head, he pulled into the parking lot of an Italian restaurant
that Alice had heard about but never been taken to. Jack put the truck into
park, but didn’t get out. Turning to face her, he lifted his hand from her
thigh and cupped her cheek. His palms were rough like she remembered from the
night before, and she cocked her head to the side, leaning into him.
“You deserve better than fast food.” He was so close that his warm breath
tickled her skin.
“And how do you know that, Mr. Turner?”
“I don’t for sure, but I plan to get to know everything about you, Miss…”
he trailed off.
“Miss Mills.”
“Will you let me get to know you?”
They were inches apart, and Alice felt her pulse throb. Heat rushed over
her and she looked deep into his beautiful eyes. For the first time in her
life, she had never felt safer than she did at that moment, even if it was with
a man she hardly knew.
“Yes, I’ll let you,” she whispered, and before she could say anything
else, Jack dipped his head, pressing his lips firmly against hers. They were so
plump and he tasted minty. His teeth nipped at her lower lip and his tongue
darted into her mouth. Any other time and she’d push away, frantic that it was
too soon, but she didn’t move. It felt right. His whiskers were like sandpaper,
but it was arousing, and she didn’t want it to stop.
Breaking the kiss, she opened her eyes. Jack looked like a child in
trouble. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”
“Why?”
Again, his eyes squinted as he smiled. It was something he often did when
he was amused. “I didn’t want to move too fast with you. I don’t want to scare
you.”
“If you’re moving too fast, believe me, Jack, I’ll tell you.”
Without skipping a beat, she kissed him this time. His strong arms hugged
her tight against him, and she felt his taut muscles beneath his shirt. She
wasn’t sure how long they were that way, but they both realized at the same
time that they were still in the restaurant parking lot.
“As much as I’d like to do that all night with you, Alice, I’m kind of
hungry. What do you say we go eat?”
***
After dinner, Alice didn’t want to go home yet. She was hoping Jack
didn’t either, and almost jumped for joy when he suggested going for a long
walk. It was a cool evening, but comfortable, and the breeze off of the lake
was fresh. She couldn’t stop thinking about the kiss back at the truck, and
though they were both quiet at the moment, it was not awkward.
Jack slipped his hand into hers, intertwining his fingers. “How’d you
like the food?”
“It was as good as I’ve heard. You?”
“Not bad.”
Just like he wanted to learn about her, she wanted to do the same with
him. She was growing attached and it scared her, but she was going to enjoy it.
“So you’re a firefighter?”
Nodding, he picked up a rock and skipped it across the lake. “Yes ma’am.
Five years now.”
“Five years. That’s incredible. I admire you guys. I can’t imagine the
kinds of days you have.”
Jack shrugged and held her hand again. “It has its moments. I can’t imagine
doing anything else.”
“So you were one of those little boys who ran around saying they wanted
to be a fireman when they grew up?”
Jack laughed at the assumption and tightened his grip on her hand. “Not
exactly. I always strutted around, claiming I wanted to be a cop. My dad didn’t
like that too much. He was a firefighter too. He was all about carrying on the
tradition.”
Alice noticed the light in his eyes as he talked about it. It was
definitely his passion. “What changed your mind?”
“Exposure to the firehouse. Seeing the camaraderie between everyone. My
dad died young from the job. I guess I felt like I had to fulfill his wishes
and I’m glad I did. I’d like to think he’s proud of me, wherever he is.” He
raked his hand through his hair. “And you? What are you going to school for?”
Alice felt bad for asking, but it didn’t seem to bother him too much. He
was definitely proud of his past. “Teaching. I graduate next semester.”
“Teaching?” Jack asked, arching his eyebrow. “Now that’s a terrifying
job.”
“As opposed to yours?”
Jack laughed. “A burning building or a classroom full of ankle biters?
Burning building any day. No doubt. Either way, congratulations on getting as
far as you have gotten. Graduating college is a fantastic accomplishment.”
“Don’t put me in my cap and gown yet. Still have that last semester to
get through.”
Jack turned to face her, holding each of her hands. Looking up at him,
Alice hadn’t realized how tall he was. Just what she liked. He had a power over
her. She couldn’t be obvious about it. She couldn’t come off that easy.
“I bet you’ll get through it no problem. You’re a great student. You’ll
be an amazing teacher.”
“And how would you know that, Jack?” She smiled, her tone mischievous.
“I can tell.”
“We’ve been out twice and that’s enough time to tell?”
Sitting down on a nearby park bench, he scooted her in beside him, never
releasing her. “I’m very perceptive, Alice. I’m learning a lot about you.”
“Yeah? Me too. What’s something you’ve learned about me?”
Reaching out, Jack caressed her neck, moving his thumb up to her lips. A
smoldering look replaced his playful expression, and they were as close as they
could get to each other.
“I’ve learned that you’re a damn good kisser,” Jack replied, leaning in,
kissing her once more. He pecked quick kisses on her cheek, down her neck, and
up to her ear, nibbling on it. A low moan escaped Alice’s throat, and she gasped
when his hand rested in the small of her back. She ran her hands through his
thick hair. It was soft and she shivered when either of his hands began to
massage her.
She lost all sense of where they were. It didn’t matter that they were
out on a park bench at the local lake. All that mattered was that she was with
Jack, and there was no place she’d rather be.
***
“Alice, honey, are you okay?”
Her mother’s voice pulled her away and she sat up on the bed. “Yeah, Mom,
I’m good.”
“I think we’re going to go grab some ice cream while you finish up what
you’re doing. Your father needs to get a few things at the store anyway. Do you
need anything while we’re out?”
Alice smiled, but it felt so fake. “No. Thanks for asking. Just give me a
little more time.”
“Take all the time you need, Dear. We understand.”
Her mother shut the door, leaving her alone again. Alice felt the warmth
gather in the corner of her eyes. The mere thought of her first kiss with Jack
made the emotions come out, and she gripped a pillow, clutching onto it for
dear life. First times were always special. She’d never forget every first time
she shared with him.
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